Do you ever find yourself following one rabbit trail...only to have it split off into another rabbit trail...only to split off again into an equally intriguing rabbit trail..?? And so on, and so on, and so on...till pretty soon you're totally lost in the woods...but engrossed in every minute of it? It's like all the little trails are somehow looped and woven together in strange but highly interesting ways...and there's just not enough time in the day to really get your head around all their nuances and meanings...and tangents....because there's always another tangent...yet unexplored...without exception!
Such is my case recently...actually a rather on-going case for me. I have insatiable curiosities...especially those related to social dilemmas and finding answers to all the big, deep, philosophical questions swirling around out there! I know, I know, there's plenty to wonder about these days...lots of unanswered questions and many ill-found solutions floating around. Lots for me to get all worked up about and highly opinionated over...that's for sure!
So, what's the tangent for today...or at this precise minute..?? Well, slightly related to my last post...but not totally....and then positioned somewhere between broad perspective and practical daily details....part total empathy and understanding...mixed with certain doubts, reservations, or concerns...desires for the ideal.....blasted against brutal reality. How's that for an answer? Nice and ambiguous, hmmm. Makes for a big stirred up kettle of fish...as my grandma used to say.
So what exactly is tugging at my heart? Well, my greatest desire is to help families feel strengthened and encouraged and even emboldened. I want to help mothers, including myself, to feel motivated and uplifted and know that there's a reason we long to have a spring in our steps and a smile on our faces...and a particular joy in our pursuits and purpose.
I long for husbands and fathers to feel needed and an integral part of the family...to be a physical part of the everyday life of his wife and children...and to know that he's a protector and provider...and teacher and leader blazing important paths to lead his precious family through the sowing and the reaping endeavors and opportunities that are definitely out there.
I long to see creative, prayerful, playful families working together..learning ways to sustain and nurture their own as well as their local community...healing the land, healing relationships, searching for affirming answers that treat this glorious Creation in ways that uphold and edify our Creator...and compliment His Wonderful and wholesome ways.
What saddens me is that I see so much of the opposite taking place. What I'm also realizing more and more, however, is that it's really not about politics and presidents and programs and petitions...although there is a place for all of that. But, honestly, it's more about a yearning of the heart....and it's this heart yearning that truly strengthens me and gives me hope...especially for the next generation. It's a heart yearning for those things that are good and wholesome and of good report. I'm in my mid-forties now...born 1962 I'm at the very tail end of the Boomers...but the very leading edge of the Gen Xer's. My heart just aches for the next generation...those coming up the ranks right now...in the thick of it...facing all that we're facing. And I know that many of our friends our age are feeling these exact sentiments as well.
We just want those younger ones coming up ...especially those young couples with little ones tugging at their knees... like we have...to know that we're here for you. They call us the big "Me-Generation" but I'll tell you, there's a growing number of us whom I would call the "We-Generation." We're not into sabotaging and squandering and stealing from our posterity. We're not into getting all we can ladle into the coffers now then checking out and leaving you to pick up the pieces...pick up the tab....scrapping it out however you're able to do it. We're into rebuilding from all this rubble and giving it to you...we want to be a blessing to you...not some selfish scourge...hoarding our loot and stacking the decks in our favor while we control the wheel and you younger ones have no say in the matter.
We want to leave you and the children of today in a better place...a much better place than where you find yourselves now. We want to invest in your creativity and your ideas, you people of our future...all the things that have intrinsic, inherent value. It's not just about some green piece of paper with a president's face stamped on it ...or a number on some bank account computer screen. Yes, it requires sacrifice...but sacrifice is a good thing...it's strengthening, it's affirming...it's life giving. We want to set an example that you'll desire to emulate for your little youngsters...our grandchildren and great-grandchildren. You're our investment...and you're worth all of it and more. We may not have all the answers at the moment...but we won't stop until we get them.
We're not interested in the big sell-out or the global money-grab or selling you down the river and hanging you out to dry. Many of my generation know only too well what that feels like. Many of our friends...including my husband...were the first latch-key children. My generation was the first to experience the prevalence of daycare....and divorce. And we were the first to be ground through the modern public school system. No, what we really want to do is build in such a way that you truly have a firm foundation to stand on...not one that straps and enslaves you...but strengthens and frees you! We long to see you fly...and be truly free!
We just spent a long extremely evocative and thought-provoking afternoon and evening with some friends of ours that we haven't seen in several months while getting together for a bowling birthday party yesterday. Mark was abruptly laid-off from his high-travel/nicely-paid corporate job sometime before the Holidays. Now Jen has gone to work on the nightshift for a cell phone company to get by while Mark helps homeschool their 2 children, receives some temporary unemployment, and is rapidly pulling the pieces together to start his own catering business. God willing, when this business gets going, Jen can quit her job and their plans are to continue their own family-run business.
The really interesting part is to listen to Mark talk about his life now...and all that he's been through...and the vision he has for his family now. They have unequivocally steadfastly made the decision to never...I mean, never...enter corporate life again. This is some of what he said to us last night:
"You're right. It does have to become a resolute decision. The pressure to return to the corporate rat-race is absolutley unbelievable. We get it from every direction...and the guilt...it's unreal. When I first got laid-off, I was absolutely frantic. I would go to sleep and wake up on the verge of having a heart attack because I didn't see any other way to provide for my family than to have this corporate job....any corporate job! I absolutely couldn't think of anything else. But as the fog began to lift...and the plug was pulled so abruptly...I began to see things much differently. I began to see how much I was missing out with my kids...how I hardly even knew them. How much I was missing with my wife....how long would it be before I didn't really even know Jen anymore?"
"The corporate mentality sucks you dry and uses you up before you really even know that it's actually happened to you. They hardwire into your being till pretty soon you think like them...you belong to them...you don't see anything beyond them. I wish that I could say that I came to this whole realization before I got laid-off...because I would walk out now. It suddenly just dawned on me that I totally do not need them. As a kid I used to have all these creative ideas and inventions....this huge imagination...but that had completely shut down. Now it's slowly coming back again. I'm slowly coming out of this comotose state that I was in...and I'm beginning to dream again...to see the creative juices flowing again...to think in all sorts of entirely new directions. Losing my job is the best thing that has happened to us. It's been hard...really hard...but we consider it a huge blessing...and we're never going back to that rat-race again."
We realize that people are losing their jobs left and right...thousands of them...and this is a very panic-inducing situation...it's frightening. But if there's any way possible, just try to embrace it ...if you can. Just try to begin to see beyond the thick fog that you're probably surrounded with at the moment....and realize that after the rain stops pouring there can be some much clearer...even beautiful skies ahead...if you just give yourself the permission to go there. This isn't about following our 'pipe dreams' either as some might refer to them. These are convictions. There's a major difference between mere dreams and conviction that a certain direction is taken because it's the right thing to do...the right way to go for the sake of our family...for the sake of our children.
This is also not to say that these directions are all smooth sailing. The bumps and obstacles can be really massive and quite intimidating. The transition is fraught with distractions and sometimes seemingly endless ways to trip us up. Believe me, we know. But there are other paths...we just have to have the courage and creativity to start blazing them out. It's really that simple...and not simple! But there are ways...and we're finding them. And we do genuinely long to help you find them too.